Time is a funny thing.
Looking at the time stamp on my latest post. 35 days ago… wow. This is the longest time I’ve gone without blogging. If you follow me on Instagram, you’ve seen I’m still attending events, still embarking on adventures and little stories, so still a lot of content to blog about. The blank space that has been growing and stretching out uncontrollably here as if exponential, you see, was not due to lack of content. But rather to a sense of my own unhappiness, ever growing dissatisfaction, discontent and finally disaffection with this space.
When there is no progress, no growth (not in terms of followers but rather self growth and in terms quality), no development I feel at unease. Yet time is ticking (way too fast), this space is getting older but it’s not growing up. It feels like it’s staying an infant child forever, stuck in one developing stage, impossible to advance.
That’s what gets me.
You see, I have this notion that with growth of time comes growth of character/quality hence development, linear to each other. But when time fast forwards and character stays stuck on pause, I become restless. I feel at unease and completely and utterly useless.
Like a waste of time.
Trousers I Hose: THANKS TO Nümph
Watch I Uhr: Michael Kors THANKS TO Designer Outlet Berlin
Earring I Ohrring: Mango
Blazer: Unknown (loving this one!)
Bag I Tasche: THANKS TO Zookie
Shoes I Schuhe: Zara
Top: THANKS TO Forever 21
So I thought about a short break to focus on bringing L is for Lois 2.0
But I never fully retreated, it’s just that nothing went live here. The occasional email from you guys and especially from Amelie, who has known my blog from birth on, encouraged me. (Thank you!) I may not always see it all and I don’t like to believe that I’m too hard on myself. But after all we are our own biggest critics.
Reading her state nonchalantly that my blog has come a long way, it coming from one of you meant a lot.
That was all I needed to hear. I have made progress.
It’s time for a change. It’s time for the next level. Time for it to finally become what I envision it to be one day. One day could be now, right? Should be..
What do they say about seizing the day or the moment..?
I can’t wait for my new blog to launch, new fresh look, clean layout, mobile friendly navigation and new content to discover. More stories to share, new adventures.
But above all: organized, a routine – a clear line to follow. Structure.
Structure that I so desperately need in my life as well.
I still feel trapped in time, in life as a rush hour.
Yet again, I feel in complete dissolution with time…
2 a.m. thoughts, one month old pictures.
Love Lois xxx