I was going through pictures on my external drive, my laptop and flickr account. I found so many unpublished pictures and stories, so many finished and barely started scraps of what were supposed to be blog posts for you. Stories, reminders, memories for me. A journal and account of my life for us.
So much has gone lost, stuck in internet limbo because I never finished typing my thoughts, or unready to hit the publish button.
Among those I found these pictures. I still remember that day vividly. It was the opening of Umami Berlin, tucked in side street behind SoHo House. (Dikjubi had successfully opened his little restaurant – Umami. It’s really good!) The taste of his mini burgers and the conversations we had. How especially pretty I thought Louisa looked, the sound of Lisa’s laugh in the middle of a conversation and the exact temperature of that day on my skin.
We talked about a case and prison sentence.
How I frankly declared that if rightfully sentenced I could survive any given time in prison. Even if given 25 to life, I would survive because there was an end in sight, no matter how far, there was an end in sight. And with each moment that passed by in hell I am still getting closer to the end.
There was a light at the end of the tunnel.
Bracelet I Armband: THANKS TO Stella&Dot, Sabrina Dehoff THANKS TO VALMANO
Earrings I Ohrringe: H&M
Bra I BH: THANKS TO Triumph
Shoes I Schuhe: THANKS TO Buffalo
I remember how Lisa and Louisa looked at me like I was completely nuts and how no one agreed with my optimistic views on a very screwed situation. A completely different approach and attitude.
Memories of that day in summer.
It’s strange how much and how clearly I can remember so little details about that day that seemed so insignificant. Don’t get me wrong, it was a beautiful day. But.. it was just another beautiful summer day. Nothing significant happened.
Memories of a summer day.
Memories of my summer.
I couldn’t wait for those long summer days that seem everlasting, stretching into the night and before you know it it’s dawn again.
Those annoying mosquito bites and crowded seas with teens up to no good. Beer bottles and pit fires.
I want to take a boat, sail out and jump into the Wannsee from that quiet side no one ever goes to again with my friends.
Eat out all day and come home only because the short night forces me too. Only because I need to recharge for another new day, not knowing what it will bring. But I welcome the day with open arms like an innocent child welcomes a stranger.
I want to feel that little bliss of closest I’ve felt of free and carefree again.
I want summer.
I don’t want summer to end.